Category Archives: dating

New Jersey Singles Teaches You How to Keep Your Independence in a Relationship

Being in a relationship with a partner doesn’t mean you must lose your independence. Today, our New Jersey Singles matchmakers will show you how you can keep your individuality and shine more than a star!

We all have that one friend who experienced a breakup and was never the same person again. Maybe it was a family member or a close friend; maybe it happened to you. Either way, it isn’t uncommon for people to lose themselves when dating. The whole idea of being in a relationship tends to overshadow a person’s independence.

No matter how much you love the partner you’re dating, you should never sacrifice who you are just to be in a relationship. Our New Jersey Singles matchmakers know there are plenty of ways of being together without having to lose yourself. If your partner demands too much of you, then you need to end this relationship and find a partner who respects your personal time and space.

Keeping your independence is one of the most important things you can do for yourself; after all, it gives you the freedom you need to be who you are. Changing yourself to please your partner is not right and will create many problems in your relationship. From small resentment issues to pure hate, to infidelity to ugly divorces, nothing good can ever come out of losing your individuality.


How to Keep Your Individuality in a Relationship

Whether your relationship is just a few weeks old or you have been together for several years, our New Jersey Singles matchmakers will show you some helpful tips to stay in control and be more independent in your relationship. There are many ways you can accomplish this, but today we’ll review some basic things you can do on a daily basis.

  1. Be Employed

The last thing you want to do is be with a partner who is always making requests from you or to be the one who is dependent on the other. Whether it’s to help them buy the new designer bag they’ve been checking or lending them cash here and there, the last thing you want to do is end up feeling like a loan officer.

It is important for both of you to be in control of your own finances. This will give you the power to make your own decisions and be the person you want to be. The more dependent you are on your partner, the more likely you are going to lose yourself in the relationship, and our New Jersey Singles matchmakers know that is the worst thing you can do.

  1. Keep Your Friends Nearby

It is completely acceptable to have the same group of friends, but always remember the friends who were there before your relationship started. Relying solely on your partner’s friends can backfire on you if the relationship goes sour. Since they were your partner’s friends before they were yours, regardless of who was wrong, they’re always going to take your partner’s side.

The realization that your shared friends will not be there to support you can be one of the worst things you can experience in life. Our New Jersey Singles matchmakers encourage you to make time for girls’ or boys’ nights out. And although it’s fine that your partner joins you every now and then, you should definitely make it a point to go out solo once in a while. Being with those friends who were there for you from the start will remind you of the person you are and will give you the support you need.

  1. Do Things Alone

You don’t really have to spend 24 hours a day together; there is absolutely nothing wrong with doing things by yourself. Whether it’s enjoying a lovely spring day with a coffee at the local coffee shop or taking some time out to hit the gym or play some golf, there is nothing wrong with doing things solo. As much as you want to be with your partner, there is nothing wrong with ditching them to do something for yourself. So go get your nails done, indulge in your favorite coffee, or just do the things you’ve been meaning to do, and do these things guilt-free.

  1. Practice Hobbies

There is no need to give up the things you love just because you’re in a relationship. It is very important you maintain your own hobbies and interests. If your partner enjoys doing the same things, great. However, most of the time, couples will have different hobbies and interests, which is important. Your partner might enjoy kayaking whereas you hate being on the water; your partner might enjoy collecting trains while you’re not into that. No matter what the situation, our New Jersey Singles matchmakers want you to remember that there is absolutely nothing wrong with practicing your own hobbies and continuing with your own passions in life. You need to feed your soul by doing the things that intrigue you. Get up and go for that morning run by yourself or take time after work to lift weights at the gym.

  1. Have Your Own Opinion

Another way to preserve your independence is by having your own opinion. You might be in a relationship, but that does not mean you need to lose your voice. Stand strong for the things you believe. If you want to be carefree about little things, such as deciding where to have date night, then do that, but when it comes to big decisions, always voice your opinions.

The same can be said for standing your ground. If you end up with a partner who is completely against same sex marriages and you fully support them, don’t change your mind just because you want to please your partner. You are your own individual, you have your own viewpoints, and you should never be afraid to share your opinion.


Our New Jersey Singles matchmakers don’t ever want you to compromise your independence and personal happiness just because you want to please your partner. If you feel like you have lost a sense of who you are in your relationship, this relationship isn’t the right one for you.

If you’re ready to meet singles who want to date you for who you are, people who will support your individuality, contact one of our expert matchmakers here at New Jersey Singles Dating Service today to get started on your quest of finding real love.

New Jersey Singles Complaints: We’re So Incompatible

Many New Jersey Singles complaints about dating come on due to incompatibilities in a relationship. But is it incompatibility or lack of common ground? And is having common ground that important to a successful relationship? Find out today as our expert matchmakers dig deep into the world of compatibility.

One of the things people look for when seeking a long term partner commonalities and shared interests. When you start dating someone new, you go through the motions of getting to know them, little by little, layer by layer. You are always communicating; you go out on dates, you try to get to know them, and you try to find out everything about them to decide whether or not you think it will work and if you want to commit to them.

What Do People Look for in a Partner?

Each person has their own specific checklist of what their ideal partner should be like, and whenever meeting someone new, the first things to get checked off this laundry list are physical attributes. Once that’s done and over, you proceed to see how they treat you and how they treat others.

But here at New Jersey Singles, we our expert matchmakers know you can’t solely rely on superficial things. You need to dig deeper and find out who they really are and if they’re right for you. And of course, you do this by talking, not texting. You start asking questions about their job, their lifestyle, their interests, and their expectations and goals. These are just a few things you want to know to figure out if you can spend the rest of your life with them or if you should keep searching. After all, some of our partner’s traits can affect our lives as well. We can’t all be the same, but we do want someone similar, someone we can really connect with.

How Do You Know If the Relationship Will Be a Success?

There is really no way of knowing if your relationship will be successful or not, and we all know things happen in a split second. And even if you get married, no one can assure you that your partner will stay by your side.

But it’s up to you. You and your partner need to make an effort to keep things going strong. You can’t just agree to commit, you actually need to commit. If you want to be with the person you love, you need to work hard for it.

There are different factors that can help you decide if someone is worth dating or not. And below, our New Jersey Singles matchmakers will review them for you.

1. Communication

A good relationship starts off with two people communicating well together. As the relationship matures, your job as a couple is to process everything through open and honest communication.

2. Instinct

Are we getting along? Is there any spark? Are there still butterflies? Those are instinctual questions your mind and body are asking, and you need to pay attention to them. If you don’t feel anything, then they are probably not the right person for you.

3. Affection

This is a necessity for a relationship. A successful relationship requires both partner’s to express themselves through intimacy and physical contact.

What If We Are Not into the Same Things?

Even on your first date, without even realizing you’re doing it, you’re mentally comparing everything your date is saying to your own personal life. When you hear something familiar, you immediately feel positive about this person and the future; however, when you don’t hear things in common you start to worry. But do you need to worry just because you don’t both enjoy classical music, strawberry cheesecake, and long walks at the beach?

Just because you don’t share a lot of the same likes and dislikes or hobbies and interests, it doesn’t mean you’re relationship can’t be a success. And our New Jersey Singles matchmakers will show you why and how you can make it work if you really like someone.

1. Have Some Faith

Just because the two of you don’t share the same passion for numbers or aren’t into all the same things, reading, action movies, and early morning coffee, doesn’t mean it cannot happen down the road. When two people spend time together, their hobbies and interests often grow on one another.

2. Dig Deeper

Not everything is in regards to career, hobbies, or interests. People can change, you can change too, and you can begin doing things your partner likes. As you grown older and experience new things, you might find common ground in unexpected places, so don’t lose all hope so soon.

3. Have an Open-mind

Even if you and your partner aren’t into the same things, you can still try to get them to like some of the things you like or vice versa. Relationships are all about growing, so you never know what could happen as you spend more time together.

4. Don’t Worry Too Much

Even if you can’t find many things in common, stop worrying so much about it. Even if your interests aren’t in line with each other, you can still make the relationship work as long as you care for them. No amount of hobbies or shared interests can compare to the fact that you love and care for your partner.

Will This Have an Effect on My Relationship?

Any relationship can be successful as long as both partners involved are willing to put in work. Ultimately, you and your partner don’t have to like all the same things in order to make your relationship work. But at the same time, you’re going to need quality time together, and that means you must both enjoy some things in common, not everything, but some things.

If you need someone who likes all the same things as you, someone who has the same preferences in movies and music, someone who has all the same hobbies and interests as you, and someone who has taken the same career path as you, what fun would that be? Relationships are about trying new things, so at the end of the day, you don’t have to have everything in common or else there wouldn’t be any room to learn or grow.

It is possible to make it work with someone who doesn’t share all the same interests as you. The important thing here is that you both have one thing in common, which is the attraction you both feel for each other. As long as you both have the same expectations and goals for the future, you can grow together as a couple. After all, here at New Jersey Singles, our expert matchmakers know it’s always important to maintain a life outside of your relationship and to preserve a sense of self in order to have a happy and healthy partnership.

If you’re currently single and searching for a compatible partner to share life with, contact our matchmakers here at New Jersey Singles Dating Service and let us do the hard work of searching and screening for you!,-74.316382,10z/data=!3m1!4b1?sa=X&ei=oFsoVYSIAsW8ggTp24HgBQ&ved=0CIQBEMgT